


Beautiful People Will Ruin Your Life

by ElleF



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Blow Jobs, Canon Compliant, Confused Keith (Voltron), Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Friends With Benefits, Galra Keith (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), Glove Kink, Hand Jobs, Hunk & Lance (Voltron) Friendship, Hunk (Voltron) is a Good Friend, I'm sad bc I wanted his character to have more depth but instead he's just v v nice, Insecure Keith (Voltron), Keith (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, Lance (Voltron) is a Mess, M/M, Mutual Masturbation, POV Keith (Voltron), POV Lance (Voltron), Panic Attacks, Pidge is a gremlin, Pining Lance (Voltron), Praise Kink, Smut, allura is trying her best, although they're technically switches, and also that's more realistic, bc EQUALITY, dominant keith, hunk is the bestest best friend ever, oh my god there's so many tags someone kill me, submissive lance, there's more I'm just lazy rn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-25
Updated: 2018-08-06
Packaged: 2019-04-07 16:48:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 15,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14085303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElleF/pseuds/ElleF
Summary: Lance knows he's in love with Keith. But he also knows Keith definitely does not need to know this. Why mess up the great thing they've got going? Sex isn't just what he wants, but he's pretty sure it's all Keith can handle. He just wishes Keith would stop talking to him about emotions, because it makes everything that much harder.Keith is just chilling, enjoying the sex he and Lance are having. Until he gets slapped in the face with some unexpected feelings and it isn't all fun and games anymore. Can he trust his newfound parent with his newfound crush?





	1. Don't Shut Your Eyes Until We Fade to Black

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title stolen from The Wombats' most recent album and I'm lazy so I'm stealing the rest of the chapter titles from the song lyrics.

“Mmmm, yes, Keith. Ughhhh, you’re so good at that,” Lance moaned as Keith’s mouth wrapped around his dick, sucking further and further down. Lance buried his hands in Keith’s hair and tugged. Keith hummed in reply, making Lance shudder and fall back against the wall as his knees weakened. Lance could feel the tip of his cock against the back of Keith’s throat and knew that if Keith swallowed just right he’d-- but Keith pulled back off a little bit and sucked just at the head, running his tongue through Lance’s slit and collecting the fast-appearing precome dripping out. Lance’s dick twitched and Keith pulled off completely, wanting to prolong Lance’s orgasm. There was a line of spit running from Keith’s puffy, fast-reddening lips to Lance’s cock, wet and shiny with salvia. Keith continued to jack Lance off as he caught his breath, wiping his mouth with one hand as he continued moving his other hand up and down Lance’s dick, thumbing through his slit every once and a while and making Lance’s hips jump up. The fingerless gloves Keith still wore made the whole experience a little rough, but Lance liked it a little rough, and moaned when the palm of Keith’s glove rubbed over his head before stroking back down.

Lance closed his eyes, not being able to bear the sight of Keith like that, kneeling shirtless in between his legs, face and lips red from the workout they’d had, looking up at Lance through his lashes as he watched for his reaction. For a moment, in the middle of his pleasure-addled state, Lance pictured grabbing Keith’s chin, pulling him up so their lips met and whispering close to his ear how beautiful he was. He would pepper kisses down Keith’s neck and make him blush for a whole different reason than he was now. _Stop_ he told himself firmly; he knew full well why he couldn’t do that. Not that he didn’t want to but--

Lance’s train of thought was halted along with the intense pleasure he was experiencing, and he opened his eyes when Keith stopped moving his hand.

“You want me to stop?” Keith questioned, his dark eyebrows arching up into a concerned look. Lance mentally cursed as he realized he must’ve said his thoughts out loud.

“No!” he exclaimed, almost too forcefully. “No,” he said again, softer this time. Sinking fully to his knees, he did part of what his heart longed to do; he brushed a hand along Keith’s cheek and tucked a piece of his wild mullet behind his ear. “I just… don’t want to come yet. I want to make this last a little while longer.” _So you won’t leave me_ his brain added for him.

Pushing the rest of his bangs, which were plastered to his forehead with sweat, out of the way, Keith rose to his feet, grabbing Lance’s wrist and tugging him along. “Ok,” he murmured, voice husky from having a dick ( _your dick_ , Lance’s brain reminded him, and said dick jumped a little at the memory) down his throat. “Why don’t we try this,” he continued, shoving Lance down on the bed and climbing on top of him.

As Keith straddled him, his black jeans rubbed against Lance’s still very hard dick, making him throw his head back and moan with the unexpected pleasure. Keith growled in retaliation and practically threw himself on top of Lance, sucking at his neck and licking over the fast-forming bruises he left in his wake. He kissed down Lance’s chest, sucking on his nipples and Lance snapped his mouth closed so fast he could hear his own teeth clack together.

Keith glanced up at him, Lance’s nipple between his teeth, and chuckled deep in his throat at the wide-eyed, surprised look Lance was giving him. “I wondered if you’d like that,” he said, flicking Lance’s nipple with his tongue one last time and making Lance’s hips jerk up in the process.

“You’re… way too… clothed… for this,” Lance huffed, chest heaving and feeling slightly like he was going to explode from appreciation of what this boy could do to him.

“Really?” Keith looked at Lance with a dark gleam in his eye before jumping off the bed completely and removing the rest of his clothes. But he didn’t just take them off, oh no. He made sure to give Lance a show.

He slowly shimmied out of the tight black skinny jeans Lance loved because they hugged his body so nicely. But nothing compared to the actual, bare ass they unveiled as Keith tugged down his pants the rest of the way, showing off the fact that he wasn’t wearing any underwear underneath. He slowly turned back around, letting Lance see the perfect curve of his hips and his well-defined abs, leading down to a nice v which continued to his dick. Lance was surprised to see Keith’s cock was already quite erect and very red, curving upward toward his stomach, almost begging to be touched. He admired Keith’s self-control while also feeling extremely satisfied that he had been able to make Keith that hard without even touching him at all.

Keith slowly stalked back over, hovering over Lance for a moment. Lance had propped himself up on his arms to enjoy the show, and lazily drew his eyes up from Keith’s dick to his face, closing his slightly parted lips when he saw the smirk Keith was sporting. Lance blushed as he realized Keith was quite enjoying the look of admiration he had worn as Keith stripped for him. Frowning a little, Lance decided it was time to take back some control.

Reaching out and sitting up a bit more, Lance let his legs dangle off the bed as he wrapped a hand around Keith’s cock. He stroked it with sure flicks of his wrist, twisting just the way he knew Keith liked. Keith gasped and practically melted in his grasp, leaning forward until his forehead was resting on Lance’s shoulder and his gloved hand was wrapped around Lance’s upper arm. Lance could feel Keith’s soft gasps of breath against his collarbone, as well as his little whines of pleasure he was making in the back of his throat. These only served to turn Lance on more, which he didn’t think was even possible at this point, and he bit Keith’s shoulder to keep in his growl of pride at unwinding the other man so fully. Keith keened at the action, squirming a little bit. Without opening his eyes, he felt around Lance’s thigh with the hand that wasn’t squeezing his bicep until he held Lance’s dick in his hand. Suddenly, all Lance could hear was their pants and groans of pleasure. The entire room sounded like, smelled like, sex; the heat built in the space and in their stomachs as they both approached their orgasm.

Keith came first, surprising Lance a little as he pulled especially hard, tightened his grip just a hair, Keith spilling come over into his hand. Lance stroked him through it, feeling Keith’s hand on his own dick falter a bit as he rode out his high. Collapsing against him even more as he twitched in the aftermath, Keith nonetheless kept his hand on Lance, whining into Lance’s ear.

“Come on, pretty boy,” Keith gasped, his breath tickling the inside of Lance’s ear. “ _Please_ , Lance. Come for me.” And Lance, well, he could never say no to Keith, especially not when he was asking so nicely. He came with a groan hidden by Keith’s collarbone as he bit down, not hard enough to leave a mark, as he knew Keith didn’t like that. He didn’t let his displeasure at the thought of Keith not wanting to remember this mar his orgasm though, as the blissful white tide rushed at him and all thoughts flew from his head.

“ _Fuck_ , that was so good,” Lance moaned as he collapsed backwards onto the bed, Keith following him.

Leaving the sticky mess on their upper bodies for now, Lance dragged Keith up so his head was resting near his shoulder. “You’re amazing,” he told him sincerely, looking into Keith’s indigo eyes, his pupils almost hiding all color as they were still blown wide with lust.

“You too,” Keith yawned, blinking slowly as he attempted to come back to-- well, not Earth, because they weren’t exactly on Earth-- the castleship they were currently floating on through space.

Lance giggled a little as he watched Keith slowly revert into his post-sex state, a personality change Lance had dubbed “cat-Keith.” He stretched out on top of Lance, not seeming to care about the fast-drying mess in between them, and pushed his face deeper into the space between Lance’s shoulder and his neck. He breathed in deeply, like he was trying to soak up all of Lance’s scent, and Lance felt his stomach flutter in reply as his hair stood on end. Burrowing deeper into Lance, Keith exhaled a contented sigh and wrapped his arms around Lance’s torso, pushing a leg in between Lance’s as he made himself comfortable using Lance as a pillow.

Lance knew Keith would be snoring within seconds unless he did something soon. Sometimes, Lance was also too tired to be bothered to clean themselves up, but today he knew would be one of those nights he’d lie awake and ponder his relationship with the sticky mullet boy currently splayed out on top of him. So he nudged Keith slightly until he was awake, led him to the bathroom where he wet a cloth, and gently wiped them both down as Keith swayed and rubbed his eyes and was just generally too cute for Lance’s heart to handle.

Lance half-carried Keith back to his bed and pulled back the messy covers to the clean sheets underneath. Tucking Keith in, he hesitated for a moment before finally giving in to his desperate heart and climbing in with him. Keith immediately turned toward Lance and tucked his head back into his neck, throwing an arm across him and intertwining their legs before his breathing completely evened out and Lance was left with an empty, quiet room that still smelled like sex and hopeless feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One night I was laying on my dorm room bed avoiding studying for a midterm and scrolling through Tinder until I saw a really hot guy and was like "I'd suck his dick" and then sat straight up because I wanted to write the first part of this (aka the smut). Basically, I have no sex life atm so I'm living vicariously through these boys.
> 
> I have the next couple chapters written but I'm kinda hesitant to post them just because I've never written a chaptered fic before (or smut; see above) so please lmk if you'd actually want to see more of this!!
> 
> Come say hi to me on Tumblr (@astroelle) I promise I'm not (completely) an astrology blog anymore!
> 
> As always, shoutout to Rylee (@levicleans) for reading my shit writing and listening to me cry about my own angsty scenes. Love and miss you, bitch.


	2. I've Clawed My Way Out of Here Before

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your weekly dose of porn with a side of feelings (except not that much porn this time). Slorp, slorp, you thorsty boys.

Keith loved mornings with Lance. They only happened occasionally, as they didn’t always have sex before bed and sometimes Lance didn’t want to stay with Keith afterwards, which Keith never understood. Once, when Keith had sleepily asked him why he was leaving, Lance had stayed quiet for a long moment, long enough that Keith had cracked an eye open to try to get a look at his face. He failed, as the room was too dark to make out many defining features, and eventually Lance had sighed and climbed into bed with Keith. Normally, Keith would’ve asked if something was wrong, but post-sex Keith was very tired and just wanted sleep and cuddles, and Lance was back where Keith wanted him, so he was content to burrow into his side and fall asleep. 

Even better than falling asleep cuddling with Lance, though, was waking up to him in the morning. Lance was so warm and soft when he first opened his eyes, and his hair was always crazy. Keith liked to tease him about his terrible bedhead and then pat it down for him while sleepy-Lance whined and tried to retreat back into the covers. Most of the time, Keith woke up before Lance and he would spend the time studying Lance’s face, never tiring of his dream-induced facial expressions. He would count Lance’s freckles, trace the slope of his slightly upturned nose with his eyes, stare at his eyebrows as they furrowed and relaxed, for hours. 

This morning, however, Keith awoke to an empty bed and cold sheets next to him. His legs were tangled in the blankets instead of in Lance’s, and his face was pressed into the pillow instead of into Lance’s harder, warmer chest. Blinking sleepily, Keith propped himself up on one arm and looked around Lance’s room. Not spotting the boy in question anywhere in the vicinity, Keith reluctantly sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed. Standing and making his way across the room while avoiding the considerable amount of video game equipment Lance had, Keith stopped in his tracks when he heard the sound of running water coming from the ensuite bathroom. Figuring Lance was in the shower, Keith settled back into the sheets, reflexively pulling out his knife to fiddle with as he waited. 

As he played with his blade, flicking it back and forth from sword to knife, he wondered when he would be sent on his next mission, pulled away from the team-- from  _ Lance-- _ once again. He looked around Lance’s room, reminded anew that he was just visiting, and that his room wasn’t really his (though it never really had been in the first place). Whenever Keith came back to see the paladins, he never really stayed for long, and he hated sleeping in the room that was just a constant reminder of the regret he held close to his chest. He had refused to decorate his room back when he was a paladin, mainly because he had the distinct feeling he wouldn’t be staying long, a feeling that had turned out to be right (as most of his gut instincts were). Now, going into his old room when he returned to the castle from time to time just hurt, especially as his old Red Paladin suit was still hanging in the closet, unused, as it waited for a paladin that would never return. 

And that’s why he ended up here, in Lance’s room, seeking solace in the sex they had and in Lance’s strong arms holding him, making him feel like he belonged again, with the team, if only for a night. 

Keith flipped his blade between forms particularly hard, leaning forward off the bed slightly in an almost-lunge. It was at that moment that Lance exited the bathroom, a cloud of steam following him into the room. Upon seeing the sword aimed at his throat, Lance flinched and let out an ear piercing shriek, jerking his hands up from where they were securing the towel around his waist to block the attack. 

Realizing it was just Keith after a moment, Lance shakily put his hands back down. “What the hell, man? Can’t a dude shower in peace without his fuckbuddy practicing sword moves and almost killing him?! It’s like nine in the morning!”

Keith blushed and lowered his Galra blade, letting it morph back into knife form as he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Sorry,” he muttered, looking at the floor.

“And!” Keith glanced back up at Lance’s squawk. “AND! You! You… you’re  _ naked! _ WHERE ARE YOUR CLOTHES?” 

Keith looked down at himself and found that he was, indeed, without clothes. 

“Like, who the  _ fuck _ practices Blade moves  _ without their underwear _ at nine o’clock in the morning! And don’t you try to pull that ‘well, Lance, time doesn’t really exist in space’ bullshit because these lights are set to  _ timers, _ man.” Lance stalked closer to Keith and pushed a finger against his bare chest. “And the  _ worst  _ thing is, I can’t even be properly mad at you right now because you’re  _ naked _ . You’re just so-- ARGH!” Lance cut himself off as he shoved past Keith and collapsed on the bed in a ball of anger and exasperation.

Keith watched him lay there for a moment, a smirk playing at his lips. He had missed the dramatics that followed Lance everywhere. Although he liked the stoic, imperturbable nature of the Blade members, he had to admit that sometimes he got a little bored. Which is why he came back to the castleship. Lance’s nice ass wasn’t the singular draw. 

Lance, still lying flat on his back on his bed, flung his arm over his face and groaned again, and Keith’s smirk widened at the sound. Placing his knife carefully on top of the video game console, he launched himself at Lance, landing on his stomach and making Lance let out his breath in a  _ whoosh. _

“You don’t like it when I’m naked?” Keith looked down at the boy between his legs, smirking widely. He wiggled around on Lance’s lap, feeling him through the thin towel separating them. “Isn’t that, like, the entire reason you invite me over?”

Lance opened his eyes, peeking at him over his forearm. Keith’s smirk turned into a giggle as he pulled Lance’s arm away from his face and started to lean down to kiss him. Lance closed his eyes and scrunched up his nose, sighing. Keith felt Lance’s puff of breath on his face and pulled back, looking into Lance’s sapphire eyes concernedly. 

“Lance, what’s wrong?” Keith sat back completely, slinging his right leg back over Lance’s body so he was no longer straddling him, and pulled some sheets over his lap to give himself some form of decency.  

Backing up against the wall, he grabbed Lance’s hand and pulled him up, dragging Lance into a sitting position next to him. Whining, Lance tried to curve away and sag against the wall, avoiding eye contact with Keith. In response, Keith wove his arms around Lance, cradling his entire upper body to his chest and forcing Lance to look at him. Lance tried to ignore the very obvious fact that Keith could definitely lift him if he tried.

“Lance…” Keith paused, eyes searching Lance’s face. “We’re friends; you know that. Hell, the last time I held you like this it was our first bonding moment, even if you claim not to remember it.” This statement was accompanied by a wry smile. “Come on, tell me what’s up,” Keith teased, shaking the boy in his arms gently.

Lance rolled his eyes at Keith’s antics and, though he grumbled a bit more, he eventually opened up. Sighing again, he looked up at the ceiling, away from Keith’s concerned gaze. “Do you ever feel… lonely?”

“Is this about your family again?” Keith tucked a piece of hair behind Lance’s ear. “Oh, Lance, I’m sure--”

“No, no, no!” Lance cut him off, scrambling to sit up a bit in order to explain himself better. Keith let his arms fall, and Lance briefly mourned the loss of those strong arms supporting him before plowing on. “Not like… family. Well, sort of, but not the type you’re related to. Like… like falling in love. Like being in love. With someone who loves you back.”

Keith blinked slowly, processing what Lance had just said.  _ Have I ever thought about love?  _ He had never really considered it an option for himself. Being left behind by his mother, shunted from foster home to foster home after his dad died, he had never really known permanence. All that instability hadn’t been good for a child’s emotional maturity, to put it lightly. He used to stare up at the stars from his bed and imagine himself far away, adventuring with the astronauts he saw on TV (he always claimed the beds next to the window, and he was willing to defend that with his fists). Although he daydreamed about the stars, when he fell asleep all his dreams were full of bright blue skies and baseball gloves, soft Texan accents and purple hair. At night, he would dream of unconditional love from parents he had never really known and wake up with a longing even stronger than the one he felt to explore the sky above his head. 

But he couldn’t tell Lance all that. That was a little much, for a friend-slash-boy-he-liked-to-fuck. So he told a different truth.

“The first boy I ever did,” Keith paused to gesture in between them, “ _ this _ with… He was similar to you. All bright eyes and brilliant smiles, but with hidden depths. I… liked him. A lot. And one day, I told him that. But he looked at me with the biggest, saddest brown eyes I’ve ever seen and told me, ‘Sorry, but I can’t be gay. Not here.’ I was confused, because I knew he was bi already, but when I saw him making out with a girl from our science class very publicly against the lockers the next day, I knew what he meant. He couldn’t… be different. Not for the weird foster kid that frowned at everyone and was surprisingly good at math. We didn’t talk again after that, but I’d still see him in the hallways, and he’d always smile at me.” Keith paused then, and glanced up from where his eyes had been fixed on the bed so he could gauge Lance’s reaction.  _ Please don’t laugh, or think I’m dumb, or-- oh fuck--  _ agree _ with him.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I WANNA GET COLLEGE GIRL DRUNK TONIGHT (if I wasn't at home for spring holiday, that is.)
> 
> My week has been WILD y'all like on Tuesday I had exactly 15 minutes to eat the only meal I was gonna get until 8:30 pm. Also I posted this thing on Tumblr about wanting to have sex and in the span of like 5 minutes I had 7 porn blogs trying to message me.
> 
> Please lmk what you think in the comments! I had the first 3 chapters written already but I've kinda not been not in a writing mood lately so the next couple might be a little slower in coming. 
> 
> Say hi on Tumblr @astroelle :)
> 
> Shoutout to Rylee (@levicleans) for replying to me when I texted her about 3 different "emergencies" in one day.


	3. You Could Give an Aspirin the Headache of its Life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is a day later than planned I have a freakin busy life

Lance’s eyebrows had shot into his hairline when he heard the first part of Keith’s confession.  _ I didn’t really know he’d done stuff like this before, not that it’s surprising. I mean, he is fricken hot.  _ Lance’s thoughts were interrupted, though, when he heard Keith describe the boy he had been sleeping with as similar to him. Flushing red, he tried not to get caught up in the fact that Keith had basically just complimented him. He refocused, his thin brows furrowing in concern and concentration as he listened attentively to Keith’s story. When he paused, Lance waited to make sure he was done before weighing in.  _ Don’t say too much. Keep it casual.  _ Clearing his throat as he met Keith’s gaze, Lance hoped his expression didn’t give away too much of what he was thinking. 

“That boy was an  _ idiot, _ ” Lance breathed, slightly surprised at the force of his words. “Keith, of course you’re worth being gay for! Uh... I mean, well, I mean that, but, like, in a better way than it came out.” Lance mentally smacked his forehead.  _ Nice job! That totally made sense! _

It must’ve made sense to Keith, though, as he smiled softly at Lance, ducking his head and looking up at Lance through his bangs. “Thanks.” Furrowing his brow in thought, he turned his attention back to the sheets covering his lap that he had been twisting between his fingers. “Sometimes, though, I wonder what would’ve happened if he had thought I was worth something.”

Lance watched Keith wring the bedsheets for a moment, waiting to see if he would raise his eyes or if he needed some help to snap out of his spiraling thoughts. Realizing that Keith needed some assistance this time, Lance leaned forward, stroking a hand down Keith’s face and raising his chin up so he was looking Lance in the eyes. Lance had learned giving Keith something else real to focus on was the best way to help him snap out of whatever he was working through in the depths of his mind. Sighing softly, Lance searched Keith’s face, waiting until the boy’s eyes focused completely on him. When Keith’s big dark eyes finally locked on his smaller blue ones, Lance inhaled deeply before telling Keith the things he needed to hear. 

“ _ Keith, _ ” Lance began, voice barely above a whisper as his breath puffed out, making Keith’s bangs sway slightly at the breeze. “Keith, you’re amazing. You’re smart and talented and so, so attractive. I was always in awe of you at the Garrison, and that dumb rivalry I always talked about when we first met; that was just me trying to get the attention of this incredible boy I was sure would never give me a second look.” Lance paused, glancing away for a second as his hand stroked down Keith’s face and neck, before he plunged on. “I used to stare at the back of your head in the classes we had together, wishing I could somehow read your mind to figure out how you did it. You always seemed so  _ cool, _ and you never cared what people thought of you. Plus, you were friends with  _ Shiro, _ and that dude was, like, everyone’s hero. I wanted to get to know you, to be your friend, but every time I so much as smiled at you at the hallway, you just frowned and looked away. So, instead, I tried to get a different kind of attention. I figured no hormonal teenage boy can resist a challenge, so I labeled myself as your rival. Guess it didn’t really help you remember me, though.” Lance laughed sheepishly and looked away again, steeling himself for the next part.  _ Tread carefully, McClain, _ he told himself, knowing he was entering dangerous territory concerning his feelings for the mullet-headed boy. “But, what I’m getting at here is that you  _ are  _ worth it. People care about you now. Maybe people always have been. Sometimes you just have to be a little open to new things if you want to find people who love you. Because you know we, the team, loves you.  _ I _ love you.” Lance’s voice cracked horrifically at the end, and he held his breath, cursing himself silently.  _ Keith’s pretty dense with social skills. He probably won’t read too much into that. Right? _

Slowly, Lance dragged his gaze up from where it had fallen to the sheets tangled in between them so he could search Keith’s face for his reaction. He almost gasped at the breathtaking, full-of-wonder expression Keith wore; his eyes were wide, there was a faint blush on his cheeks, and his lips were slightly parted. He was looking at Lance like he had just put the sun in the sky, and Lance found himself blushing in response. 

“Lance, I haven’t-- I’ve never-- I didn’t know. I wish I had. I didn’t mean to make you so miserable at the Garrison. I’m sorry. I wish I had been a better--”

“No, no,  _ no! _ ” Lance cut Keith off, emphatically shaking his head. “That is  _ not _ what I wanted you to get from that.” Chuckling softly, he shook his head at Keith, his hand moving to play with the long strands of Keith’s hair at the base of his neck, slightly exasperated as to how to show this boy that he cared.  _ Without giving away too much, _ his brain reminded him. “I just wanted you to know how much I care. How much I’ve always cared. I wanted you to understand that you weren’t as alone as you thought, and if it was up to me, you’d never be alone again. Keith, I love you so much. Sometimes when I look at you I get a physical pain in my chest because of how much I--” Lance cut himself off with a strangled cry, realizing too late he had said too much. 

Letting go of Keith’s shoulder, where his hand had come to rest after playing with Keith’s hair, Lance backed up, remembered he was only clothed in a towel, and tried to pull it more securely around himself. He quickly realized he couldn’t sit still and just wait for Keith to process all the dumb things he had halfway confessed, especially when he was still mostly naked, so he got up from the bed, grabbed his clothes, and made a beeline for the bathroom, yelling over his shoulder in a rush, “Sorry I gotta change real fast Shiro will wonder where I’ve been especially since he’s been so weird lately but I guess you wouldn’t know because you haven’t been here which is fine I know you’re busy with super important missions I just miss you a lot I mean everyone misses you a lot ok bye!”

Swishing the bathroom door closed behind him, Lance let out a huge breath and leaned against the door, looking at himself in the mirror.  _ What the actual  _ fuck  _ was that, McClain?! You basically just spelled out your feelings toward him! He’d have to be a total idiot to not understand what you meant! He’s gonna think you’re super weird and dramatic for being so obsessed with him for so long and he’s  _ definitely  _ gonna be freaked. You  _ know  _ you guys agreed on no commitment. There’s no fucking point when either of you could die at any moment! And Keith can’t even see you more than he already does. There is literally no way you guys could possibly make it work. Not that Keith would want to anyway. Shit. How long have I been in here? He probably thinks I’m, like, sick or something. I’m acting way too weird. He’s gonna ask me about it and want to talk and I don’t even know what to say. “Yeah, I’ve been in love with you since you drove us all off a cliff on your hoverbike.” Like _ that  _ will go over well. Ugh, I need to get back out there and  _ fix  _ this. But first, clothes.  _

Lance pulled on his traditional jeans and baseball tee, quickly running his fingers through his hair and giving his reflection a half-hearted smile.  _ It’s ok. Lancey Lance can handle anything. Just go out there and… say something.  _

He took another breath. And another. And another. He knew he was stalling, but he couldn’t seem to make himself press the button to open the door. Suddenly, a knock came through the haze of his panicked mind. 

“Lance? Are you ok in there?” Keith’s mildly worried voice filtered through the door. 

“Yeah!” Lance called back, mentally cursing at how high and weird his voice came out. “Be out in a second!”  _ Ok, better.  _

He took one more deep breath to steel himself before pressing the button and walking out into the room. He found Keith fully clothed again, wearing his Blade suit Lance had torn off of him not 24 hours ago when they had finally gotten some alone time together. Lance took him in for a moment, silently appreciating the way the suit broadened Keith’s already wide shoulders and accentuated his slim waist.  _ Man, those Blade guys sure do know how to make a suit.  _

Lance was shaken out of his thoughts by Keith speaking. “Lance, I got called on a mission.” Keith was looking at his communicator, already focusing on the next problem he was given. Lance both despised and admired Keith’s ability to block out everything but the mission. 

Lance opened his mouth, even though he had no idea what he was going to say.  _ “Sorry I was so weird, but--” No. “We should talk before you go.” Not quite. “I love you so fucking much; please don’t leave me.” Ew. Gross.  _ Lance finally settled on crossing his arms over his chest and saying, “Be safe.”

Keith glanced back up at him and gave him a soft smile. “Aren’t I always?” he teased, weaving around Lance’s video game equipment one last time to give Lance a gentle kiss on the mouth before darting out the door.

Lance attempted to recover from the heart attack he was currently experiencing, and fell back on the bed with a groan. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lmk what you think in the comments or you can talk to me on Tumblr (@astroelle)
> 
> Shoutout to Rylee (@levicleans) for being the most not annoying person to get drunk w and gluing herself to my side for the entirety of last night (and, of course, bc she helped edit/give me feedback on this chapter)
> 
> Next chapter might not come for a bit (I'm giving y'all a fair warning now)


	4. The Thoughts I Juggle Are Made Out of Glass

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lolololol what is plot? I tried right?   
> PS I hate this I banged it out in 2 hours and I despise it pls give me a reason to like it in the comments.   
> PPS take some Wholesome Krolia I just want them to be happy together ok? It doesn't matter that it might be OOC after June 15th it's fine I'm fine that's a lie I'm a mess

Keith entered the Blade of Marmora control room to find Kolivan already waiting, staring at the multiple mauve holoscreens projected in the air in front of him. Kolivan didn’t move at the sound of Keith’s footsteps echoing around the room as he walked up the steps. Pausing, the last of the reverberations from Keith’s steps died and the room fell silent. The quiet stretched on, long enough that Keith began to feel uncomfortable. He missed the sound of Lance’s teasing voice.  _ What I wouldn’t give to hear him laughing, even at my expense.  _ The thought took Keith by surprise, and he tensed, wondering where that had come from. Thankfully, he was stopped from delving deeper into his emotions by Kolivan finally ceasing his fiddling and turning his attention to Keith. 

Dropping his hands from the keyboard-like object at his fingertips, Kolivan turned to Keith. Keith automatically dropped his arms to his sides and straightened, wanting to show strength in front of his leader. His position as a Blade was still a little shaky, after all, as he was the only human-Galra hybrid any of his fellow members had seen, and many of them still doubted his strength and his ability to think clearly through his emotions.

“I’m sending on a mission with your… mother,” Kolivan started, and Keith couldn’t help his eyes widening in surprise, although he tried to keep his face mostly neutral. “Now, I know normally we don’t do this, as emotions between a mother and son can get… messy, to say the least, but you two have a specific skill set needed for this and, furthermore, no one can deny how well you work as a team. Besides, after all that stealth training Krolia insisted you go through, the pair of you are the best covert operatives we have.” Keith swore he saw Kolivan’s eyes dance a little, as though he found the thought of Keith’s stealth training amusing, though it may have just been the light from the holoscreens changing as the picture of their newest target appeared before them. 

“This is Plorvek. He was a Blade, long ago, until he disappeared around the time Haggar began experimenting with quintessence on Galran soldiers. He was a lower level soldier, so we assumed she took him for her own, and, as such, terminated any passwords, codes, etc he had access to as a Blade. However, since Zarkon’s defeat, we have found footage of him on this ship we liberated a few quintants ago.” Keith watched the screen as Plorvek, a large, purple-tinged, furry person that looked full Galran, appeared, stumbling down a hallway as the way he came spewed smoke. “Although he wasn’t on the ship, this places him as being alive less than seven vargas before we arrived. Only three escape pods were ejected during that window of time, and we assume he was in one of them. One burned up when passing a nearby star, another crash-landed on an uninhabited planet, and the last one was captured by a ship still under Haggar’s control. It was a routine supply ship we would have missed had it not taken the escape pod, and, as our search team for the second pod found nothing, we are hoping he was on the pod taken by Haggar’s ship.”

“I thought we didn’t care if another of our members was taken. Why would you bother getting Plorvek back if he hadn’t mattered before?” Keith tried not to sound too bitter when he questioned Kolivan; he still didn’t exactly agree with the Blade’s mentality of not valuing their members’ lives.

Kolivan leveled him with a look that clearly showed his displeasure at Keith’s sharp tone. “Because he was presumably held captive by Haggar for quite some time without perishing, there is a good chance he has insider information on the inner workings of Haggar’s experiments. That information could help us take her down for good.”

“Why not just send in a team to capture the ship? Why the need for stealth?” Keith couldn’t help but ask; he didn’t understand why he needed to be pulled away from La--  _ from his Voltron family _ yet again.

“The ship is already deep into volatile space; the area of the most infighting between Galran factions. Although the Voltron Alliance is doing their best to clean it up, there’s still a considerable amount of violence in the surrounding area to risk blasting through with a normal team. We need you and Krolia to get in and out unnoticed.”  

Keith nodded his assent. “When do we leave?”

“Now.” 

Keith turned at the sound of a voice behind him and saw his mother across the room, leaning against the wall.  _ When the fuck did she get here? _

“I came in a little while ago. I guess you were too busy interrogating Kolivan to notice.” Krolia’s mouth quirked up at the corner as she pushed off the wall and made her way across the floor toward them.

Keith felt his cheeks redden as he realized he must’ve spoken aloud. “Sorry,” he muttered. 

“It’s okay,” Krolia rubbed the top of his head when she reached them, and Keith couldn’t find it within himself to duck away. “Am I allowed to call you kiddo yet? I heard it’s what a lot of Earth parents do.” 

“Heard from who?” Keith chuckled a little, shrugging away from her as she attempted to fix the mess she’d made of his hair. “It’s not like you go to book club or anything.” Running a hand through his-- _ it’s not a mullet, ok, Lance-- _ mop of hair, Keith waited for his mother’s inevitable snarky reply.

Kolivan cleared his throat, not giving Krolia a chance to gibe back. Keith deflated a bit, his amicable smile dropping off of his face in favor of a more stoic expression.  _ Right, the mission. The first mission I get to go on with my  _ mom.  _ Except the time I actually met her, of course.  _ Keith felt the corners of his mouth turn up at the memory of their first meeting over three months ago.  _ It was a rough start, but we made it.  _ Although he still wasn’t completely comfortable with being parented after so long taking care of himself, he enjoyed having someone to lean on. It took a few awkward days of stilted, clumsy conversation before Krolia finally cornered him and made him talk things out with her. Over the last few months, Keith had gotten more comfortable with trusting her, and had even begun to treat her almost how he did Shiro before his disappearance. He was glad she had made good on her promise to not leave him again.

Keith was pulled back to the meeting room when Krolia grabbed his shoulder and said, “We can handle it, right, Keith?”

“Yeah, of course.” Keith glanced up at his mom for a moment before looking away again, not being able to stand the blatant fondness in her eyes focused at him. Like he had tried to explain to Lance earlier, he wasn’t so good at the love thing. 

Keith found himself thinking about his time spent in Lance’s bedroom more and more as he followed Krolia into a flight pod and allowed her to begin navigating her way to the more volatile quadrant of space. Lance was just so… frustrating? Overwhelming? Amusing? Endearing? Attractive? Keith’s mind settled on the last one. It was easy to admit how hot he found Lance; after all, he  _ was _ sleeping with the guy. Keith let himself think about dark-skinned hands, considerably lighter after over a year spent in space away from the sun, skimming over his legs, up his stomach and shoulders and burying themselves in his hair. Lance would be straddling him, and use the fingers tangled in Keith’s hair to tug his face up to Lance’s level and kiss him. Lance was a huge tease, and would wind Keith up, slipping in a little tongue before kissing down his neck and leaving hickeys in places that would make Keith glad his Blade uniform covered the majority of body. He would whisper things in Spanish that would turn Keith on despite not understanding a word. God, Keith wished he understood. He’d love to learn Spanish, just to see the look on Lance’s face when he replied to whatever he was saying. He knew how much Lance missed speaking it, and thought part of the reason why he liked to use it around Keith was to make sure he still could, although there was the added bonus of making Keith look stupid. Keith would always listen as Lance made the language sound almost like a song, enraptured by his lilting voice, before shaking himself from his stupor and dumbly asking, “What?”

Keith wished Lance was here now to talk to him in Spanish and then laugh at his confused expression. 

_Wait, no! You miss him for the sex. Not the laughing and the beautiful way he talks and the pretty way his eyes light up when he knows he knows something you don’t-- nope no shut up!_ Keith didn’t realize how fiercely he was frowning until Krolia broke through his thoughts with a clearing of her throat.   
“Keith, are you ok? You look like you’re trying to set fire to the remainder of Zarkon’s army with that glare. Get it? Because you were the Red Paladin? Who has an affinity for fire?” Krolia’s eyes danced as she attempted to cheer him up. 

Keith couldn’t help but roll his eyes, mouth quirking up.  _ God, Lance would love her. I wonder if she’d approve-- stop! You guys aren’t dating, remember? It’s not like you’d ever introduce them. Except, like, with the rest of Voltron.  _

“Keith, you’re doing it again,” Krolia chided, taking her hands off the controls and standing up, as they were currently in a peaceful part of space.  _ The calm before the storm _ , Keith thought offhandedly. 

“Sorry,” he sighed, uncrossing his arms and letting them drop to his sides in order to let his body language seem more open. Lance had taught him that, and--  _ stop thinking about Lance! _ “I just can’t stop thinking about… stuff.”

“Look, you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. I know this whole mother-son thing is pretty new, and I don’t expect you to confide any deep, dark secrets in me anytime soon, but… I’m here if you need to talk.” Krolia gave him a reassuring smile before beginning to stretch, giving Keith the space he needed to think for a moment. 

Usually, he would go to Shiro with stuff like this. Important… stuff. Not that Keith had ever really talked to Shiro about his crushes before. He didn’t really have time for that at the Garrison. Once he met Shiro and enrolled there, his entire purpose became trying to be the best pilot he could, so someday he could join Shiro out in space, and finally be among the stars he had dreamed about for so long. He wasn’t even aware of his and Lance’s so-called “rivalry”; he was too busy worrying about himself to worry about the loud Cuban kid who only seemed to get louder when Keith was around. In fact, the last boy Keith remembered caring about in that way was the guy he had told Lance about. After that hard rejection, he had stopped thinking about feelings and let his body’s urges choose for him. The guy down the hall is hot, single, and likes the same gender as you? Time to get his number in case your heating “breaks” again. The cute boy across from you in physics wore a bi shirt the other day? Make sure to grab him as your partner before anyone else can. Soon, Keith had a slew of potential booty calls. His only policy was never tell, and the other guys were usually pretty understanding of his rule. After all, he actually did help that one kid get an A in physics, and that other boy really benefited from using Keith’s single room as a place to crash when his roommate was having (very loud) sex in their shared room.

Keith didn’t know how much Krolia understood about human sex policies, though, and he didn’t really feel like having _ that  _ conversation with his mom. Still, he couldn’t stop thinking about Lance.  _ Why  _ couldn’t he stop thinking about Lance? The last time he’d felt anything comparable had been--

“Oh my god, I have a crush on Lance,” Keith blurted before he could think through what he was saying.

Krolia turned from where she had been pulling her arm in a contorted position that, on a human, would’ve most likely dislocated her shoulder, and, smiling mischievously, said, “Oh, is that the blue boy? He  _ is  _ pretty cute.” Seeing Keith’s panic-stricken face, she immediately dropped her arm and her teasing act and came over to where Keith was standing. Putting a hand on his arm, she ignored the way he automatically tensed at the physical contact, and hummed sympathetically. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Slowly, Keith nodded, and Krolia re-set the navigation to the scenic route before turning her complete attention to her son, who was currently staring blankly at the wall. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear god I can't do this guys thanks so much for over 1000 hits! I screamed when I saw and told my (sorority) sisters and they all rolled their eyes fondly I'm an emotional mess production assignments are tomorrow so basically my entire next semester hangs in the balance I'm a crying wreck but if y'all wanna hear me scream more I have a Tumblr (@astroelle)
> 
> Convince me I'm not terrible at this in the comments (I pulled that Plorvek shit out of my ass hire me now Lauren Montgomery pLEASE)
> 
> HUGE shoutout to Rylee (@levicleans) for calling me a nerd on camera, screaming with me all the time, and OH YEAH COMING UP W A ROCKING GALRA NAME thx bby here's a lil kissy kiss from me to you 
> 
> I feel like this reads like I'm on cocaine :))))


	5. I'm Scrambling in the Dark

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THERE IS A PANIC ATTACK IN THIS CHAPTER. IF THIS IS TRIGGERING TO YOU, BEGIN READING AFTER THE ~.~ BREAK
> 
> Omg this is longest chapter I've written so far and it has a lot of Dumb Shit in it so I hope you enjoy!  
> Lmk if my characterization is dumb asf bc it lowkey seems like it to me :))))

Keith had already been MIA for three days before Team Voltron was informed. Lance… had not taken it well. He was used to not hearing from Keith for a few days while he was gone on missions; he knew Keith liked to focus completely on one task, and with the high level threats he faced off against, he couldn’t really afford to get distracted.  _ Yet another reason why you’ll never have a real relationship.  _ “Shut  _ up _ ,” Lance growled at himself, shoving his hands through his hair and making the already shaggy strands stand up in different directions. “You might not even  _ have  _ a boy to fucking be in a relationship with if we don’t find him soon.” Lance hadn’t even worried, hadn’t even  _ questioned  _ when Keith didn’t reply to his last message. “Stupid, so fucking  _ stupid.  _ You should’ve known.” 

Lance paced up and down his room, almost knocking over his large TV with his frantic movements. He felt like the biggest idiot in the world.  _ Why didn’t I just  _ tell  _ him? Now, I might never get the chance.  _ Lance couldn’t tear his mind away from the endless cycle of negative thoughts. He felt his breathing getting more uneven, his face getting hot, his hands beginning to shake as they pressed against his scalp, but didn’t process any of it.  _ Where do you think he is right now? In a cell with no toilet, huddled against the wall, trying to be brave like the fiery boy he is? Or did Haggar _ \-- Lance outright snarled as the name entered his mind-- _ did that hell-beast already break him? Is he wishing he was with me, that I was there to comfort him like that one time he had a nightmare about his parents and I hugged him close to me and rocked him until he fell asleep? Is he crying? Is he in pain? Was he injured trying to fight his way out like he always does? I knew he burned too bright for me to hold. But… I still want to hold him. Just one last time. Please, God, or the universe or  _ whoever, _ don’t let Keith be dead. I’ll do anything. I need him. I can’t… I can’t be without him anymore. I don’t know  _ how _. _ Lance’s breathing had grown more and more erratic until he could no longer keep pacing. Gasping for air, he fell against the wall, his elbows resting on his knees as he clutched his head in his hands and fought against his own body for breath. 

Distantly, Lance noted he was having a panic attack. Behind the haze of red alarms echoing around his head, he processed the door being slid open. He felt a hand on his shoulder, warm and large and comforting. Lance’s red haze faded to yellow.  _ Hunk.  _ Hunk gently removed Lance’s hand from his hair and placed it over his own stomach, breathing in and out slowly and letting Lance feel the rhythm. Slowly, as Lance mimicked the pattern of Hunk’s breathing, he became more aware of his surroundings. He focused on Hunk whispering soothingly close to his ear, as well as the small circles Hunk was rubbing on his back with the hand that wasn’t occupied with holding Lance’s against his stomach. 

“Hey, buddy,” Hunk said. “Can you hear me? It’s all ok Lance. Just focus on me and my voice and breathing. Can you hear me now?”

Lance nodded, still unable to speak.

“Ok, good, that’s good. Now, do you think you can speak yet?”

Lance took in a few more breaths and nodded again.

“Ok, great. Good job, Lance, you’re doing amazing.”

_ Sweetie,  _ Lance couldn’t help but add in his mind. He knew he was getting calmer if he was referencing an old-as-dirt meme from the 2010s. 

“Lance, can you name three things you hear, three things you smell, and three things you see?” Hunk asked a standard question that had helped bring Lance out of a panic attack and back to where he was before.

“Uhhh…” Lance took a breath, looking around the room. “I see my bed, my TV, and the game console me and Pidge dove into a fountain to get-- that was a good day.”

“Do you want to talk about that day, now that you’re calmed down a bit?” Hunk asked, although he had heard the story many, many times. 

Lance shook his head. “I want to finish noticing things.” His voice had a certain childlike lilt to it that often happened when he was recovering from a panic attack; he needed to be taken care of for a bit afterwards, as he felt shaky and weak, and that often resulted in him being more infantile than usual. “I hear ummm… I hear you breathing, the castleship’s fans, and my TV humming. I smell… hmmm.” Here Lance paused, sniffing. “I smell my own soap, stale air, and you-- and you smell amazing, as always.”

Hunk chuckled. “If you can compliment me, then it must mean you’re okay.”

Lance managed to form a small smile at the sound of Hunk laughing, glad his friend wasn’t annoyed at him for having to help him out of a panic attack-- again.  

“So, Lance, what brought this on?” Hunk gently placed his arm around Lance’s shoulders, pulling him in for some cuddles.

Lance shrugged, looking at the floor. He didn’t know if he was ready to talk about it yet. 

“Hey.” Hunk nudged Lance until he looked up at him. “Do you want to go eat some snacks and then sit on the couch until we both fall asleep from sheer boredom?”

Lance smiled, slightly shakily still. “Did you perfect your cookie recipe yet?”

“I don’t know, wanna find out?” Hunk grinned teasingly down at him.

“Ok,” Lance agreed, smile stretching into something brighter and more genuine as Hunk pulled him upright and led him around the piles of video game equipment to the door. 

~.~

After stuffing themselves with Hunk’s Almost Just Like Your Mom’s Earth Chocolate Chip Cookies (patent pending), the two boys sprawled out on the common room couch, too full to move much. A solid few minutes were spent in silence like this, until Hunk quietly took in a bigger breath and asked, “Was it about Keith?”

Lance paused a moment, trying to compose himself. “Yes,” he sighed out, almost too breathily to be heard.

“Come here.” Hunk held his arms open for Lance to get a hug. Lance practically fell into him, curling up in his best friend’s lap and relaxing into his warm embrace. 

Lance fell asleep like that, cuddling a person that meant more to him than words could describe, feeling the love radiating between them.

It was a peaceful few hours. Until Pidge entered and apparently decided it was time to disturb their tranquil slumber.

“Wake the FUCK up, nerds,” she screeched, so close to their faces Lance could feel her breath hitting his cheek. She blew on Lance’s face relentlessly, until he was standing and chasing her around the room, screaming incoherent swear words, as he was still half asleep. Hunk watched amusedly from the couch, rubbing one of his eyes and yawning. 

“I think she’s just jealous,” Hunk said slowly, a grin spreading across his features. Lance and Pidge stopped in the midst of their fight, which had progressed into wrestling; Pidge simultaneously keeping her glasses balanced on her nose and putting Lance in a headlock while Lance pulled Pidge’s hair and attempted to flip them so he was no longer underneath her tiny (but weirdly strong) body. 

“Huh?” they both said confusedly. 

Hunk’s shit-eating grin only grew wider as he advanced toward them. Pidge and Lance remained frozen, slightly terrified of their apparently insane friend.

“Yeah,” Hunk continued, “I think she’s just jealous. Jealous that Lance gets a hug and she… doesn’t!” On the last word, Hunk lunged forward and picked both of the teenagers up. 

Pidge immediately started kicking and screaming, begging to be let down. Lance, meanwhile, giggled with glee and wrapped his arms around the two of them as best he could. 

“I think you’re right, Hunk!” he crowed. “I think Pidgey just needs some good old fashioned love and affection!”  
“I do _not!_ ” Pidge complained, still squirming. “Let me _go!_ ”

“Aw, it’s cute when they’re in denial,” Lance stage-whispered to Hunk. Hunk nodded in agreement, still smirking.

“I! Am not! Cute!” Pidge screamed, giving one last Herculean attempt to writhe free before slumping and finally giving in-- or so Lance thought. After staying still for a moment, Pidge suddenly drew in a huge breath and  _ screamed.  _ Though scream wasn’t really the right word to describe the high-pitched sound of utter madness emanating from Pidge’s mouth. It was like the gates of Tartarus had been opened and all the demons from below were pouring out of Pidge’s throat. There seemed to be no end. All there was was Pidge’s scream. No other sounds existed anymore. The only things Lance could remember from the two minutes it took Pidge to tire herself out was Pidge opening her mouth, that god-awful noise, and then the hard impact of the ground as Hunk finally dropped them. 

The next thing he could process after the ringing in his ears subsided was Allura helping him up and patting him on the back sympathetically while Hunk booked it out of the room.  

“Are you alright, Lance?” she asked concernedly.

He nodded absently, eyes still trained on the back of his little gremlin friend. “She’s… she’s an actual demon,” he whispered to Allura.

Allura giggled. “I highly doubt that Pidge is an evil spirit from Earth’s underworld, but I am glad you are unharmed.” 

“You didn’t hear what I heard, ‘Lura.” Lance turned to look at her with eyes as wide as satellite dishes and as serious as Coran’s tales of Yalmors. 

Across the room, Shiro was leading Pidge to the door. She was crying about how Lance and Hunk had been mean to her, and Shiro was nodding along sympathetically.  _ That little gremlin liar!  _ Right before they turned the corner of the doorway, Pidge glanced back over her shoulder and stuck her tongue out at Lance. In response, Lance flipped her off. 

“Does that not mean something very offensive in your language?” Allura inquired.

Lance eyed her for a moment, trying to decide if the question was serious or not. Sometimes, Allura liked to mess with him, asking dumb questions about Earth culture and pretending she had no common sense before turning the questions around on him and making him look like an idiot. Deciding he didn’t much care either way, he answered her question. “Yeah, it’s pretty offensive, but the little gremlin deserved it, so.” Lance shrugged. 

“I understand.” Allura nodded. “Back on Altea, I would joke with my friends often, too. We all knew it was only in jest, though.” A shadow passed over her face and her newly-damp eyes shone in the light, the way they always did when she talked about her long-gone home planet. 

With the change in mood, Lance couldn’t help but remember what had happened earlier. He rubbed the back of his neck, watching Allura carefully and trying to decide if he should talk to her about Keith. 

Honestly, at this point in his hopeless pining, he was sure the entire castleship knew how he felt about Keith. He had attempted to hide it for a while, but ultimately he grew lazy and decided he didn’t care who saw him openly staring at Keith when he trained, or laughed, or just fucking downed his food goo like it was some delicious gourmet meal. And recently he had been connecting with Allura more as a fellow paladin. He saw her more as a friend and equal than some unattainable princess far above him, only deigning to acknowledge his presence when they were working together in battle. 

Allura noticed him scrutinizing her and blinked the wetness from her eyes, refocusing on him and the present situation. “What is it, Lance?” 

_ Ha, I love how her accent makes my name sound like “Lonce.”  _ Lance shook his head slightly and looked down, trying to rid himself of his stray thoughts and keep his mind on track. 

“I just… I was just thinking about Keith.” Lance gave her a brave smile, trying to hide how broken up inside he was. Allura’s entire body seemed to soften at the words, and she returned his smile with a gently reassuring one of her own. Lance gulped, not knowing how to continue, but Allura seemed to understand, as she placed a hand on his back and led him to the couch, where she rubbed small circles onto his back and guided him to sit down. 

“I understand how much you care about him, but do not worry; you aren’t alone in this. We all care about Keith and we  _ are  _ going to get him back. Remember, we’re in currently in contact with Kolivan and we’re going to send a mission as soon as the volatile space around them clears up a bit. Please, Lance, do not stress yourself over this.” Allura tried to reassure him, and Lance knew she was right. They were doing everything they could. But how could it be enough when Keith was out there, maybe getting  _ tortured  _ at the hands of the space-witch?

“I know, ‘Lura,” was what Lance voiced aloud, slurring his words slightly with the emotion his voice held, “but it just feels so out of my control. I want to help him. I wanna be where he is right now. He shouldn’t have to face this alone. He shouldn’t have to face  _ anything _ alone.” His voice cracked on the last words, and he broke with it. And that’s how he found himself sobbing into Allura’s shoulder in the middle of the fucking common room. 

He cried himself out on his favorite space princess, and, when he was done, Allura took him back to Hunk because she knew, in her heart, Lance needed his best friend more than her. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all wanted Keith and Krolia to talk it out but guess what? It was time for Lance's POV 
> 
> If you get panic attacks or have ever had one, I made sure to include some helpful tips to calming yourself down. My instructor did the "3 things you notice" one to me when I fell off a horse and started having one. Another helpful thing that I didn't include is the square breathing technique where you draw a square in the air w your finger. You breathe in while counting to four and drawing the horizontal side in the air, then out for six while drawing the vertical side, around and around until you're calm again. I used that one backstage after I convinced myself I fucked up calling cues during a show.  
> Gentle reminder that not everyone likes to be touched during panic attacks, and you shouldn't assume what works for some ppl (aka Lance in this fic) will help calm your friend down. Always ask if you can touch first, unless you know they need a grounding feeling when they're panicking. 
> 
> In case you've been following my little life updates, I got the production assignment I wanted!! I'm stage managing a show as a sophomore (which is lowkey unheard of) I'm so hYPED!!!
> 
> Scream with me on Tumblr @astroelle
> 
> Thank you to Rylee (@levicleans) for losing her shit at the Pidge part I really love your snort laugh, bitch.


	6. I'll Hold Your Hair Back and You'll Hold Mine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So uh I attempted to write action?? I think I did kind of a shitty job though lol so ummm lmk what your opinions are

Keith jolted awake. He became immediately aware of the hard, cold ground underneath him, then slowly blinked his eyes open as sounds began to filter in. Along with the sounds, though, came the pain. He let out a soft groan as agony rocked through him, making him squint his eyes closed again. He struggled to breathe, feeling exactly the way his ribs twinged with every heave. 

Although his body was screaming at him, Keith knew he had to get up. He slowly sat up, almost blacking out as his head swam with another newfound injury.  _ Ok, so we’ve got a couple broken ribs and a definite concussion. Nothing we haven’t dealt with before. What else?  _ Keith had found that talking to himself in his head helped him stay alert and focused through the strain of battle. 

Sitting up the rest of the way, Keith observed that he was currently behind a stack of gray boxes. _That explains why no one’s murdered me in my passed out state._ Absurdly, Keith couldn’t help but recall the one time he had gone to a party and had seen a girl passed out in a room. Her friend was with her, guarding her to make sure no one would try to take advantage of her. _Where’s my friend?_ Keith wondered, a bit hysterically. He furrowed his brow and was hit by a wave of pain, making his vision swim. _Yup, okay,_ _definitely a concussion_.

Keith pulled himself into a crouch, peering over the tops of the boxes, and was met with a sight so bizarre he almost thought he was hallucinating. There, in the middle of the floor of what appeared to be a cargo bay, was his mother, surrounded by the fallen bodies of Galran soldiers as she took on an army of them, completely alone. As he watched her, Keith’s memory abruptly snapped back to him; he remembered getting onto the ship to rescue Plorvek, remembered being betrayed by Plorvek, as their mind was too far gone to be loyal to anyone but Haggar. He remembered getting captured, thrown into a cell where he could see his mother but she couldn’t hear or see him, remembered waiting, hoping for his next meal, the next time he’d get water, remembered watching as Krolia fought the five guards that tried to muscle her out of her cell, remembered banging against the door of his cell until she blasted her way in with one of the fallen soldiers’ weapons. He remembered creeping through the halls, running when they were inevitably found out, a blur of fighting, and then pain, across his entire body, and then--nothing. And now, this. This blur of muscle and sword and guns as Krolia twisted and danced and wove her way through the ranks of Galran robots, slicing off a head with her-- Keith’s--  _ their _ knife, then picking up the blaster from the robot’s body and turning to shoot the next five soldiers before the gun jammed, or ran out of ammo, or whatever happened to these blasters to make them not work anymore. Krolia was beautiful. Krolia was terrifying. For the first time, Keith understood what Lance meant when he said he could watch Keith fight for hours. 

_ Lance.  _ Keith remembered the boy with a start.  _ I have to get back to him. I need to tell him how I feel. I can’t-- I can’t leave him like this.  _ Suddenly with a renewed sense of purpose and body coursing with adrenaline, Keith drew himself up. In complete silence, he hurtled over the boxes and charged into the fray, his fighting style seamlessly melding with his mother’s as they danced together, blazing a path to the escape pod Krolia had muttered the existence of to Keith a few moments after he had rejoined her. Keith ducked and rolled between two soldiers, slicing their knees. As they crumpled, Krolia charged forward and decked four more, smoothly dropped to the ground and executing a kick that brought another down. Keith’s chest heaved, his ribs sending licks of pain up and down his side, but he fought on, thoughts never leaving Lance. 

At last, their backs pressed against the doors. Keith reached out and slammed the button that opened the hatch with his hand; his Galran blood activated the mechanism and the doors began to open, crawling upwards. Letting out a ferocious shout, Krolia simultaneously stabbed the sword into the nearest bot and wrenched the blaster from its grasp, shooting at the control board across the room. The shot landed, perfectly stopping the soldier who was about to hinder their escape, and Keith couldn’t help but think of his sharpshooter.  _ We need to focus on not dying,  _ not _ your potential love interest, idiot.  _

Keith eyed the distance between the escape pod and the door he and Krolia were backing through, trying to decide if they could stop holding the robots at bay. As usual, Keith went high risk, high reward, and yelled, “Run for it!” to his mother as he turned and made a dash for the pod. Diving in, he ducked around the corner, waiting for Krolia as she retreated while laying cover fire. 

“Come  _ on! _ ” he screamed, beginning to strap into the controls. 

Krolia finally hurtled in, and Keith immediately closed the door and ejected them from the ship. 

“Hold on,” he managed through gritted teeth. His head was still aching, and his ribs felt like they were on fire, but he navigated them through their attackers’ fire as they tried to blast them out of this universe. Plunging them into a steep drop, Keith heard Krolia grunt and, a second later, felt her claw-like nails digging into his shoulder. He let out a hiss but kept going, pushing through the immediate space around the ship and racing away as fast as possible. 

It was a good five minutes of intense flying later before either of them dared to break the tense silence. They were out of the worst of it, having lost the ship by dodging through an asteroid field, and the rocks were getting smaller and further between. Relaxing in the relative safety they had found, Keith loosened his grip on the controls and sat back a bit. 

However, with his change in position, a fresh wave of pain suddenly washed through him. His vision blurred and he gasped, his hands spasming as he grasped at nothing. When he could concentrate again, he felt his mother lifting him out of the seat and laying him gently on the floor. For some reason, he felt an intense moment of deja vu. 

Keith lay on the ground, trying not to move too much so he wouldn’t be in so much pain. He could feel his body slowly shutting down and he fought to stay awake.  _ No! You have to stay alert! You have to help your mother! You have to see Lance again… Lance…  _ “Lance…” Keith murmured.

“Yes, Lance and the others are coming.” Keith distantly heard Krolia’s I’m-trying-to-be-reassuring voice. “Look, there’s the Altean princess’s ship. They’re coming. You’ll see your blue boy again.”

“Lance…?” Keith whispered the name again, but added a little question on the end this time.  _ Lance is coming? Why is he coming? What’s happeninguhhh…  _ Keith slipped into an all encompassing blackness, almost as deep as the space around them. 

~.~

Blue light. Pale gray walls. Tan skin, a few shades lighter after over a year spent in space away from the sun. Soft, long fingers carding through his hair. 

“Never thought it’d be the other way around, huh, buddy?” The tearful voice broke on the last word. “Just try not to forget this, okay?”

Wiry arms lifting him. His head lolling back, his neck muscles too weak and pained to hold it up.  _ Lance. Lancelancelance. Please, listen to me. I need you.  _

“I…” Keith’s throat was too dry to continue. 

The rhythm of Lance’s footsteps stopped. “Keith?” His voice was deep and breathy, off-kilter. 

Keith groaned a bit. He managed to raise his head and open his eyes. Deep blue met bright blue, made even brighter by the tears shining within them. 

“Lance…” Keith’s fingers twitched, longing to touch him, to make sure he was real. But he was so, so tired.  _ I think I like you. No, I  _ know  _ I like you. I care about you so much, too much. I can’t be without you.  _  “I… Please don’t leave me.”

“Never.” Lance managed to intertwine their fingers as Keith’s eyes drooped again, his head sagging, but his fingers holding as tight as they were able to Lance’s.

Blue light. Pale gray walls. Tan skin, a few shades lighter after over a year spent in space away from the sun. Soft, long fingers holding tightly to his.

Movement. Being turned upright. Fingers pulled from his. His hand giving one last twitch as cold surrounded him.  _ Lance… he’ll keep me warm.... Where… where is he? He promised…. He promised he wouldn’t leave. _

~.~

Keith lurched forward, falling. Strong, large arms caught him.  _ Hunk. But where’s-- _

“Hey, man. We were all so worried!” Hunk’s voice broke through Keith’s haze as he wrapped Keith up in one of his bone-crushing hugs.

“I’m so glad you’re back!” Pidge bounded up to them, taking Keith’s hand almost shyly and squeezing it, as it was pretty much the only part of him Hunk wasn’t squashing to death. 

Hunk finally let Keith go, but just as soon as he was released, he was swept up in another, more muscular hug.  _ Shiro. _ Keith smiled and buried his face in Shiro’s shoulder. He hadn’t realized how much he missed the rest of the team, not just Lance. Speaking of…

“Where’s Lance?” Keith tried not to let the worry bleed into his voice. 

Shaking his head fondly, Hunk gestured behind Keith. Turning, Keith found Lance slumped against his healing pod, completely passed out. 

“He managed to stay awake for the first two days, but passed out around the fortieth hour. Too bad you woke up during the forty-fourth.” Pidge smiled affectionately.

“Yes, he must get to bed soon,” Allura spoke from across the room, where she had evidently just entered. “Keith.” Her lips stretched upwards. “It is good to see you again, safe, this time. Also, do not worry about your mother. She is safe and back on the Blade’s base.”

“Okay, thanks for letting me know,” Keith said, grateful to know that both his mother and his... Lance were fine. “Sorry if I scared you guys.”

“He needs some help,” Hunk nodded toward where Lance was still asleep. “I’ll--”

“No!” Everyone stopped and looked at Keith in surprise at his outburst. “I mean… I got it. I can take him.” He tried to backtrack smoothly. 

Pidge smirked and shared a look with Hunk. Shiro noticed, and rolled his eyes at their antics, but his lips twitched slightly. Allura just smiled diplomatically and said, “Very well, Keith. We will see you at dinner.”

“You are staying for dinner, right, Keith?” Pidge surprised everyone by asking, a hopeful look in her eyes. 

“Uh, yeah, of course,” Keith tried to smile at her as reassuringly as he could with Lance passed out in the corner. Unable to focus on anything but  _ LanceLanceLance,  _ Keith turned away from Pidge and walked over to the boy, wedging his arms underneath Lance’s lanky body. Lurching to his feet, Keith made his way out of the room, the rest of the team completely silent as he went. As Keith rounded the corner, he thought he heard a snort from Pidge and then a huff, as if she had been elbowed in the side. 

Keith shuffled down the hallway, humming a piece Lance sometimes sang to him when he had nightmares. He didn’t know the words, as they were in Spanish, but he knew the tune well enough. It was a peaceful walk to Lance’s room, Keith holding Lance to his chest and feeling his even breaths going in and out. They were almost there when Lance began to stir, jolting a little in Keith’s arms and almost knocking him off balance. Recovering, Keith paused, looking down at the man he was cradling in his arms for the second time in less than a year. 

He watched as Lance’s eyes fluttered slightly, short eyelashes standing out against his sharp cheekbones. Lance’s lips parted as he sighed, turning his face toward Keith and burying his face in the other boy’s chest. Keith’s heart seized a little, a flurry of butterflies spreading through his center and out, making him feel warm and tingly, the opposite of the healing pod. Shifting Lance up a little, Keith continued to his room. 

Juggling Lance and opening the door was slightly difficult, but he managed well enough. Keith wove around Lance’s copious amount of video game equipment and deposited the limp boy onto the bed. Stretching his shoulders and arms, Keith yawned and watched as Lance’s brows furrowed and relaxed.  _ I wonder what he’s dreaming about? _

“Keith…” Lance muttered, turning toward the edge of the bed where Keith was.

_ Oh,  _ Keith thought, blushing a little. 

Lance reached an arm out, and Keith caught it. Lance tugged a little, still mostly unconscious, and Keith relented, a smile tugging at his lips. He allowed Lance to pull him closer and climbed into bed with him. Immediately, Lance wrapped his body around Keith’s and sighed, relaxing completely on top of him. Keith listened to Lance’s quiet breathing and allowed the other boy’s warmth to encompass him, drifting contentedly off to sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I keep adding chapters to this and I'm (not really) sorry :)
> 
> I also acknowledge that I promised smut and I meant to have some like 2 chapters ago but sometimes when you write it goes a completely different direction than you think and that's basically what happened here sorry (not) sorry but I'm like 95 percent sure I'll have some next chapter sooooo
> 
> This chapter is written in a really different style than the one I usually use. I blame the background music I was hearing from onstage.
> 
> Thanks for over 100 kudos! They mean a lot!! (although comments are a slight bit better coughcoughhinthint)
> 
> I wrote this during tech for the show I'm ASM for and made myself cry lol my crew was like "are you ok??" and I was like "yeah this just happens sometimes"
> 
> Scream w me on Tumblr (@astroelle)
> 
> The biggest Kissy Kiss Gammy goes to Rylee (@levicleans) for listening to me cry on the phone last night over everything (aka the semester) ending and dumb shit like feeling empty inside etc and for not losing her shit when I (slightly creepily) asked her to tell me about her day to calm me down. Reach out to your friends no matter how scared you are!! I swear they'll help and if they don't then they suck trust me I've had my share of sucky ones.


	7. Snowflake in a Desert

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the smut y'all KNOW you want

Lance rolled over, grunting a little as he encountered a soft object laying next to him. Stretching a little, he cuddled deeper into the object’s warmth, burrowing into the soft sheets around him.  _ Wait… sheets? Why is the floor of the healing pod room covered in sheets? Wait… why is the floor so warm? Why…  _ “Keith?” Lance muttered sleepily, opening one eye, trying to figure out why the healing pod room had warm sheets in it. Blinking slowly, Lance took another look at the boy next to him in bed.  _ In bed?! _

Lance bolted upright, looking wildly around his room. “What the fuck? How did I get here?” 

Next to him, Keith was slowly waking up, shifting a bit and grunting. Lance paused for a moment, watching him. An awakening Keith was a sight to see. Though not very rare, it was almost as entertaining and endearing as cat-Keith was. Keith’s brow furrowed and his lips parted, exhaling a soft groan as his eyes slowly blinked open. His eyes were dark with sleep, the pupils almost as wide as when they tracked Lance’s movements on the training deck or in the bedroom. Keith’s eyes slipped closed again after a moment, his long, dark eyelashes fluttering against his sharp cheekbones as he seemed unwilling to respond to Lance’s slight panic. 

_ He probably hasn’t slept in a while,  _ Lance sympathized.  _ After all, he was a captive of the Galra for almost four days, and in a healing pod for-- _ “Keith,” he breathed, interrupting his own thoughts as he suddenly remembered what happened. The almost-sleepless nights, Hunk holding him as he sobbed and tried not to panic thinking about what had happened to Keith. The despair he felt whenever he was alone for even a moment, because, although Allura tried her best to convince him that  _ yes, we are looking everywhere, and as soon as we pinpoint the location of the ship that took him we will send Voltron, _ Lance couldn’t stand sitting around doing nothing while the man he loved was in danger. 

Lance drank in the sight of Keith for another moment, his name falling from Lance’s lips again, almost in awe this time. Awe that this boy was still alive, and  _ in his bed. _

“Whaaaaat,” Keith finally succumbed to Lance, whining as he slit open one eye to stare at Lance begrudgingly. 

Lance’s lips quirked into a deep, soft smile, one that warmed him up from the inside out. “You’re alive, doofus. And in my bed.” Lance didn’t think he had ever felt this fond of anyone in his entire life. “You’re  _ alive _ ,” he breathed again, leaning down so his breath brushed Keith’s face. He bumped his forehead gently against Keith’s, nudging Keith’s nose with his own until Keith was giggling quietly and murmuring “stop, that tickles,” against Lance’s lips.

Grinning wider, almost giddy with relief, Lance pressed their lips together, feeling his smile echoed in the curve of Keith’s mouth. Their breath huffed quietly between them as they both chuckled, Lance because he couldn’t believe Keith was here, and Keith because Lance was laughing, and he couldn’t help but join in. 

Their giggles slowly died down as their eye contact grew more intimate, Lance’s ocean blue eyes staring into Keith’s night indigo ones. Lance pressed their lips together with more force, intent on making it clear to Keith how much he meant to him, even if it was just through this kiss. He lost his breath when Keith kissed back with just as much, if not more, eagerness. Their lips slotted together, Keith sighing contentedly as Lance placed a hand at the back of his neck, tilting Keith’s head up so he could get a better angle. As often happened with them, things became very heated very fast. Lance parted his slightly and dragged his teeth along Keith’s lower lip, earning a soft groan from the boy underneath him. Encouraged, Lance threw his leg over Keith, pressing him down into the mattress and pushing his tongue into Keith’s mouth. Keith let him have control of the kiss for a bit before Lance felt him tense.  _ What is he-- _ Lance barely had time to think the words before he was being flipped over onto his back, Keith suddenly sitting on top of him and straddling him.

Keith sat up a bit in order to take off his shirt. In the process, he ground down onto Lance, making the other boy realize how hard he was.  _ When did that happen?  _ Lance thought hazily, drinking in the sight of Keith’s abs on full display above him. He had a few new scars along his ribs that had Lance frowning and stroking them with the pads of his fingers. He raised his head and drew Keith’s torso towards him, licking and sucking over the new scar tissue until Keith was trembling and the edges of the marks could barely be seen, as they were now covered by hickies.  _ My mouth did that,  _ Lance thought proudly, his rational thought dulled by lust as he sat back again, slightly winded.

Keith practically collapsed on top of him, finding Lance’s mouth with his own and kissing him until Lance was almost as shaky as Keith was. Feeling more confident, Keith kissed down Lance’s neck and began sucking at the juncture of his neck and shoulder, where his shirt didn’t cover.  _ Where my shirt doesn’t cover? But he’s always so carefu--UH!  _ Lance couldn’t complete his thought as Keith suddenly reached a hand down his pants and cupped his steadily growing erection. 

Popping off of Lance’s neck with a wet sound, Keith glanced up at Lance, hand still wrapped around Lance, feeling him through his underwear. “Is this ok?” he asked, voice husky.

Wide-eyed, Lance nodded, and Keith smirked, beginning to move his hand slowly, too slowly. 

“More,” Lance gasped, unthinkingly, still making direct eye contact with Keith. This proved not to be so smart of a decision, as he got to see the complete change that overtook Keith when he accidentally begged. 

Keith’s expression turned sharp; he bared his teeth and stroked Lance harder. “Like this?” he asked, too innocently.

Although Lance should’ve known what was coming, he was too turned on to notice the signs, and just moaned and nodded. “Yes, Keith, you’re so good, it’s so good, I--ah!” Lance made an aborted noise as, suddenly, all pressure was removed from his dick. 

Lance blinked his eyes open, not having realized he closed them. “Um, what?” he rasped.  _ When did my voice get like that? _

“Remember, only good boys get to cum. Are you a good boy, Lance?” Keith looked down at him appraisingly. 

Wordlessly, Lance nodded. He loved when Keith got like this, all dominant and in charge. Sometimes they switched roles, but Lance was feeling rather submissive today, and he trusted Keith to take him through whatever he was planning. He knew Keith knew how to make him feel good. 

“Good,” Keith praised, and Lance shivered. “Now, suck my dick. But don’t touch yourself. Only I get to touch you.” Keith eyes glittered as he pulled down his pants and boxers, his cock springing out, already quite hard. 

Lance obediently sat up, wriggling a little as he tried to find the best position to please Keith. He started at the tip, sucking lightly, and then moved down further, taking almost all of Keith in his mouth before pulling off and jacking him off as he caught his breath and steeled himself for what he was about to do. Taking a deep breath and relaxing his jaw, Lance sunk down all the way, taking the entirety of Keith’s dick in his mouth until his nose was brushing the base. He looked up at Keith, who was looking down at his with the most amazed expression. But no expression compared to when he started talking.

“Oh, Lance, baby, you’re so good, so amazing. No one will ever be as good as you. You know exactly how to please me; you’re so good at it. You make me feel incredible. I could never be with anyone but you. Babe, you’re so wonderful, so beautiful, taking all of me like that. I can’t believe I got so lucky. Fuck, keep doing that. Is it ok if I fuck your throat?” It seemed like Keith couldn’t help but babble things to Lance, and it went straight to Lance’s dick, making him shiver and get even harder, if that was even possible. Keith seemed to realize Lance wasn’t able to answer his question, as he currently had a dick down his throat, so he added to his previous statement. “Blink twice for yes, once for no.”

Lance slowly blinked twice, eyes never leaving Keith’s. Keith smiled, sharp like broken glass.

Keith buried his fingers in Lance’s hair and tugged lightly, testing his grip. Lance moaned, his eyes closing slightly, and Keith made a noise deep in his throat in response. Slowly, Keith drew out of Lance’s mouth, only to push himself back in, dragging Lance’s lips over his cock. All the while, Keith was murmuring about how good Lance looked, how beautiful he looked with his mouthful of Keith, how amazing he was for taking Keith’s dick like that. Keith slowly began to build up speed, until he was too breathless to praise Lance anymore and the only thing that came out was broken compliments.

“Beautiful--ah! Fuck--Lance! You’re so--ugh! Amazing! Mine! All mi--uh! Mm--Lance!”

Now, Lance prided himself on his blowjob ability. It all stemmed, really, from the ability to hold your breath. And growing up on the beach in Cuba meant that he was a strong swimmer who could hold his breath for quite a long time. But even little boys who think they’re mermaids have to come up for air at some point. Although Lance’s dick would like him to keep his mouth on Keith’s cock forever, if it meant he’d keep praising Lance like that, and Lance’s heart quite enjoyed the possessiveness Keith was exhibiting, Lance’s brain was noticeably screaming for oxygen. 

Luckily for Lance’s brain, though, Keith was about to orgasm, as evident by his hitch in breath and the telltale tremble in his legs as his thigh muscles tightened.

“Lance-- I-- I’m gonna--” Keith’s cum filled Lance’s mouth, and Lance swallowed it all. Keith had stopped thrusting into his mouth after he began his orgasm, but Lance kept his mouth on Keith’s dick throughout it, sucking him clean of cum as Keith twitched in the aftermath. Finally, Keith pulled him off by his hair, not being able to stand the overstimulation as it began to bleed into painful. 

Keith just stared at Lance for a moment, breathing hard, before pulling him up into a kiss, not caring that Lance had been swallowing his cum just moments ago, and reached down to finish Lance. Except, he only encountered a sticky wet spot where Lance’s erection had once been. 

Pulling back from the kiss, Keith looked at Lance, who was not-so-subtly avoiding eye contact. “Did you…?” Keith asked, smirking a little.

“Come just from you talking about how good I was? Yeah, maybe,” Lance answered, still avoiding eye contact as his cheeks reddened. 

“That’s…” Keith trailed off, and Lance glanced up at him, trying to read his expression. “Really,  _ really  _ fucking hot.”

Lance’s lips parted as he watched Keith’s face transform into one of absolute fondness and… love?  _ Shut  _ up _. He doesn’t-- he would never-- stop! _

“C’mere.” Keith pulled Lance back towards him, kissing him full on the mouth again. 

They lost their balance and flopped back on the bed, landing in a tangle of limbs. Keith laughed, a full body movement that Lance couldn’t take his eyes off of. 

Keith opened his eyes to find Lance staring at him. Instead of acting like it was weird, though, Keith just smiled softly back at him. He gently reached over and brushed a piece of hair back from Lance’s face. And for some absolutely  _ idiotic _ reason, this was the thing that made Lance’s breath catch and his heartbeat stutter. Even though he had just had this man’s dick in his mouth not even 5 minutes ago, the simple act of Keith being gentle had butterflies erupting in his stomach. 

Keith kept smiling that gentle, fond smile at him. “Hey, Lance.”  
“Hey, what?” Lance hoped his voice sounded at least slightly normal, not strangled in the back of his throat where his heart currently resided.

Keith leaned into him, his lips just brushing Lance’s. Lance closed his eyes, ready for the kiss.  _ Yes, kissing, not talking. I can kiss. It’s just when the talking happens that things get… complicated.  _

But instead of kissing him, Keith was whispering something. Something that sounded a lot like-- but then Keith was kissing him and Lance was leaning into it, brain still trying to catch up, trying desperately to process what Keith had just said. 

_ “I love you.” _ Lance’s brain finally deciphered the sounds that had come out of Keith’s mouth just moments ago.  _ He.. loves me? He…  _ Lance’s mouth was still occupied, and his thoughts were a bit distracted by the kiss, so it took another few moments for the words to fully take effect. 

_ “I love you.” _

_ He… _

Lance pulled back from the kiss. 

“You…  _ what?!”  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok. So. The thing is, I love all your comments so so SO much I just can't reply to them unless I'm drunk bc I feel insanely awkward for some reason but pLEASE know I love and appreciate every single one of them I squeal over them and laugh and show them to my friends and read them like 18 times a day so please please please keep commenting! I'm literally just too freaking awkward to acknowledge them and I'm sorry.
> 
> I'm also so SO sorry this is up a day late I haven't eaten more than like one meal a day for the past week bc I've been so busy w the production I'm ASMing and senior stuff (not that I'm graduating lol) and finals ugh sorry I'm literally the worst
> 
> I was deadass texting my friends (aka Kestrel and Rylee) like "how do I describe kissing???" before realizing they've never kissed anyone before (Important side note: ITS NOT WEIRD TO COME TO COLLEGE W ZERO EXPERIENCE I PROMISE SEX BEFORE COLLEGE IS NOT AS NORMAL AS PPL THINK I SWEAR ITS HEALTHY TO WAIT) anyway I'm dumb and can't describe things for shit
> 
> I may or may not have projected onto Lance a lot in this chapter (just w the kink stuff :))))) but also who doesn't like praise??? and having a dick in their mouth???? y'all know Lance has a big mouth for a reason 
> 
> I have a Tumblr :) @astroelle 
> 
> HUGE shoutout to Rylee @levicleans for betaing this shit and convincing me I'm not going to hell for this I'm sorry you got a migraine bb
> 
> small shoutout to Kestrel @crypticsparrow even though he doesn't read this shit but he's been great this past week and I miss him even though I've been without him for less than 48 hours


	8. But I Don't Really Care Whether It's Gray Skies or Blue

Keith was having trouble seeing why Lance was upset. Because Lance had been angrily ranting at him for the last eight and a half minutes about how he wasn’t allowed to confess to him like that, even though Keith was certain that he had heard somewhere in there that Lance loved him back. 

“... and another thing, too. How dare you carry me back to my room and just decide to stay the night before even  _ checking  _ with me? Like, I know we’ve spent the night together before but it was very presumptuous of you to just--”

Keith tuned back out again. At this point, Lance was just ranting to rant because he was an over dramatic person who could never just move past a situation (at least, until he talked it to death). Keith usually found it endearing, but right now he was bordering on annoyed. Lance had exactly zero reason to be upset. 

“ _ What _ did you say?” Lance asked, hearing Keith’s subconscious grumbling.

“I  _ said _ , ‘You have no reason to be upset.’ Because you don’t. I just wanted to tell you the truth. I mean, I already had to hold it in for, like, a week and a half.” Keith made some broad gesture with his arms that might have been attempting to demonstrate the exact length of a week and half, but really just ended up making him look like a bird trying to take off.

“A week-- a week and a  _ half _ ?!” Lance sputtered, incredulously. “First of all, you were in a healing pod for, like, a third of that, plus, you think a week and a half is hard? I’ve known I was in love with you for over a year! How hard do you think it was for me, having your beautiful face to fuck but not to love? It was so--umph!” Lance was cut off abruptly when Keith grabbed him and pulled him into a tight hug. “Um… buddy… Keith… why?” Lance asked.

Keith pulled back enough to look Lance in the eyes. “You said you’ve loved me for over a year.” His eyes were bright as they searched Lance’s, a happy smile taking over his mouth. “You, Lance McClain, the outgoing, handsome, kind man from Cuba, have been in love with me, Keith Kogane, loner, hothead, and an actual alien, for over a year. That’s… probably the craziest thing you’ve ever said, and I was there when you hit on Allura for the first time.”

“Keith, I… Of course I love you. You’re amazing. You’re a strong, capable leader, an awesome fighter, a good listener, and you have really hot abs. You check all my boxes.” Lance winked.

“I just… can’t believe it. I never really thought… I…” Keith started to feel tears welling up in his eyes and he stepped back, sitting down on the bed. 

“Hey, hey. Keith, you know if you cry, I’ll--” Lance cut himself off with a sniff, his eyes beginning to feel wet as well. 

Lance sat down next to Keith on the bed, wrapping his arms around the smaller boy and pulling him close. Keith buried his face in Lance’s shirt and Lance buried his face in Keith’s hair as they both sobbed quietly in a ball of messy emotions. 

After a moment of muffled crying, Keith’s tears began to subside. Breathing in Lance’s scent, Keith suddenly tensed as he heard footsteps approach from down the hall; his Galran Blade-honed senses picking it up before Lance realized. Lance, feeling Keith’s abrupt change in manner, looked up as well, both boys staring down the door as the footsteps hesitated for a moment before the door slid open.

A large silhouette blocked the light from the hall as it slanted across the floor and illuminated the dim room. Squinting, Hunk peered in. 

“Lance, Keith, you in here?” he called, a hint of concern and apprehension clear in his tone. “Are you guys… good?”

“He _ means, _ have you two fucked and confessed your feelings yet?” Pidge yelled from her perch on Hunk’s back. “I would like to eat breakfast with my entire space family for once!”

Lance grinned at the sound of Pidge calling the team her family so easily, and Keith smiled fondly at the sight of Lance. Making eye contact with Lance, Keith let everything fall away as he leaned in for a kiss, because  _ I can do that now _ , he realized with amazement. His epiphany was cut short, however, when Pidge screamed. 

“Ew, no! Not in front of my innocent, child eyes! I don’t want to see that!” Pidge shrieked, somehow flipping her tiny, agile body off of Hunk’s back and landing neatly with her feet planted on the floor.

“So, uh, I’m guessing you two are good, then?” Hunk asked, eyeing the way the two boys were tangled together, Keith practically sitting on Lance’s lap as they both balanced on the edge of the bed.

“Yeah, we’re good.” Keith grinned dopily at Lance and leaned in again, asking for a kiss.

“Just great,” Lance agreed when he and Keith eventually separated again.

“Oh  _ god, _ is this what we have to look forward to from now on?” Pidge groaned, averting her eyes from the PDA.

“Oh, you guys!” Hunk sniffed, wiping his eyes. “I’m so, so, happy for you!” He leapt forward and swept the two lovebirds into his arms, squeezing them as Lance giggled and Keith’s grin became even wider, if possible.

“You guys are ridiculous,” Pidge said, rolling her eyes as the sound of laughter filled the room.

“What’s that, Pidgey? Is that a cry for attention I hear? Do you need some love and affection?” Lance crowed, snorting at Pidge’s horrified face.

“Oh, yeah, Pidge you want some of this?” Hunk gasped, out of breath from laughing.

“No!” Pidge screeched, skidding out the door as she tried to escape.

Hunk grinned devilishly at Lance before unceremoniously dumping the two boys on the floor and then racing out the door, in hot pursuit of Pidge. 

As Hunk’s pounding footsteps and Pidge’s screams began to fade away, Lance turned to Keith. 

“Hey, man.”

“Hey,” Keith smiled languidly at him, leaning back on his hands.

“I love you, but… you really need to shower.”

“I love you, t-- hey!” Keith glared indignantly at Lance.

“Hey, it’s true! You were in a healing pod! Plus, we definitely had sex after you got out!” Lance held up his hands. “Don’t shoot the messenger!”

“Fine.” Keith rolled his eyes and stood up, making his way into the bathroom.

Lance laid back on his floor as he heard the water turn on, letting out a contented sigh. Suddenly, the door swished open, and Lance turned his head to see Keith’s decidedly naked upper body poking out. 

“You… want to join me?” Keith asked, sounding almost shy.

Lance paused, taking in the sight of the man he loved, eyes trailing down the almost-mullet, down well-muscled shoulders and tracing his defined pecs. Letting out a breath, he let a large smile spread across his face. 

“Yeah,” Lance said, looking into Keith’s big eyes. “I’d love to.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry it took so long. I got busy w finals and work and then lowkey forgot about this fic. I hope y'all like this 3 month late ending and I apologize for writing a fwb fic w only 2 sex scenes
> 
> As always, shoutout to Rylee (@quiznaky) for being amazing. I can't wait to live down the hall from you in a week and binge the next season of Voltron together!
> 
> I have a Tumblr @astoelle


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